Man Allegedly Gets Treated Like Woman; Sues

Okay everybody, grab a box of tissues.  We're going for a ride in the waaaaaaaahmbulance.

I'm going to post the Daily Beast article in its entirety, adding emphasis of my own.

"A former Google executive has filed suit claiming he faced retaliation and was eventually fired because he reported sexual misconduct by a colleague. Ryan Olohan, 48, claims the tech giant swept his complaint under the rug because he is a man and the alleged aggressor is a woman. According to the New York Post, the suit alleges that Tiffany Miller groped Olohan at a business dinner in 2019--and then began reporting him for microaggressions after he went to human resources. Miller denies it. “This lawsuit is a fictional account of events filled with numerous falsehoods, fabricated by a disgruntled ex-employee, who was senior to Ms. Miller at Google,” her spokesman said. “Ms. Miller never made any ‘advance’ toward Mr. Olohan, which witnesses can readily corroborate.”

What drew my snark about this was my personal experience.  I recall working at a certain law firm in Chicago back in the day.  One of the attorneys was a notorious creeper.  He would lean against our shoulders while we did his work. None of us were comfortable with having his genitals on our arms.

None of the women in my work group appreciated his leering looks or his double-entendre comments.  At one point he brought in a box of vintage porn photos that he claimed had belonged to a deceased client, and he supposedly needed his secretary to inventory them.  She was to number each one and give them descriptive titles, which she declined.

When I finally got fed up with his bullshit, I went to HR and complained.  They immediately told him who had complained.  Then he came straight to me and gave me shit about it, immediately, and each day thereafter.  He was a partner, I was at the bottom of the typing pool.  They made no attempt to prevent him hassling me about it.

A few weeks later I was "reduced in force" for lack of work.  Then they hired someone else to replace me.  Did I have the means to sue the law firm that I worked for?  No, no I didn't.

So forgive me if I don't collapse into a puddle for poor, dear, Ryan Olohan.  I'm not calling him a liar.  It sounds like they have an extremely sloppy interpersonal culture over there.   She was probably rude and they obviously didn't get along.

I'm just saying that what happened to him isn't that big of a deal in the scheme of things.  She didn't even allegedly touch his dick, only his stomach.  She still shouldn't have touched him or talked about his wife or their sex life, especially if she's his superior.  And so?  Grow the fuck up, Ryan.

Does that sound harsh?

If Ryan had a real problem and weren't being a dork about it, I would be right behind him.

Look at the first thing I highlighted there.  He's claiming that the reason Google didn't pursue it is because the alleged aggressor is a woman!  HAHAHAHAAAAAA  OMG as if Google is now somehow pro-woman?  GOOGLE? Google is the great enabler of toxic women?  Bless his heart. 

No darling, this is how sexual harassment and general workplace bullying have always worked.  Nobody has ever given a fuck about your feelings or your personal space being violated.  They always do whatever makes you go away with minimal disruption to their work flow.  Welcome to our world.  Take a number whenever you stop sobbing.

Look, it's not impossible that a woman boss grabs your junk.  Some dweeb allegedly had the nerve to grab Terry Crews' balls, who is big enough to snap people like twigs -- in front of his wife, no less.  Sex offenders do stupid and crazy things, and some of them are female.  It's a power trip.

This article from The Daily Mail gives a lot more detail, which actually makes me much less sympathetic to Olohan overall.  Really it was the "... and they wouldn't help me because I'm a man" that made me want to watch him get skewered by narwhals, but also this:

• All of these alleged issues arose while the coworkers were drinking together after work hours.  In other words, could have been avoided, unlike the ton of sexual harassment I have had to march through my entire working life -- for which I am sure I got paid much, much less than Ryan Olohan.  But whenever we have a shitty male coworker, we're expected to definitely not go out drinking with him after he's already groped us once.  And if we do, when he rapes and strangles us, it's our own fault, right?  Every time.
• The "groping" in question involved her touching his abdomen only, no actual sex organs.  GO FUCK YOURSELF, RYAN.  As a paramedic I don't know how many people grabbed my boobs and crotch while I was working, and I literally just swatted their hands away because I knew that any other action on my part would be career-ending.  So put on your big-boy britches and really just GFY, Ryan.  I know women who have been raped, penetrated and strangled at work, didn't dare come forward at all, were forced to quit and find other jobs whether they could afford it or not.  Just fuck you, Ryan. 
• The Daily Mail article makes it really clear that Ryan feels very victimized as a white guy. 
• Now, if his boss was being obnoxious to him sexually, and he was told, "You gotta let Tiffany be Tiffany," that's messed up.  I'm not a believer in "let X be X," the old "boys will be boys."  If Google is now extending that to women also, that's not a net positive nor a feminist milestone, that's just bullshit.  Less accountability for toxic women is not the goal.  But if that is what happened, that Google is sweeping his complaint under the rug, it's not because he's a man and she's a woman.  It's because that's how the world has always worked, honey bunny.

Bottom line, Ryan Olohan's argument is that women get a free pass and men are under attack, boo hoo hoo.  I wonder what color is the sky on his planet?

Ryan should be really grateful he doesn't have boobs, that's all I can tell him.  I'm really trying to sit here and even think about every time I got harassed or grabbed on the job, and how insanely rich I would be if I could have sued somebody every single time.

Next time don't go out drinking with your coworkers so much.  You should know a good-looking guy like you can't be around women when they're drunk, they get ideas.  Dress in a way that doesn't show them your tight abs.  Always have somebody walk you to your car.  Keep your keys laced in between your fingers.  You know, the hundreds of things women have to constantly do to hopefully avoid getting sexually victimized.